The illusion

Three years since I first started blogging, I’m beginning to get a glimpse of the phantoms that real writers battle:

The illusion that, regardless of what happened yesterday, today you’ll have nothing to say.

The twinge of loss when you write something worth writing.

The pain of putting an idea out into the world.

The fear that something has left you that you can’t get back

It is like giving away anything real and true – love or friendship or money or some other long-treasured thing.  Our mind tricks us into feeling that these things we give away are ours, that they are finite, that the safest thing to do is to cling to them fiercely.

Over and over we practice creating and letting go.  We practice being open.  We dare to strive to be our best selves, reaching so far that we are exposed and vulnerable.  And yes, sometimes we fail. Our leap comes up short.  We crash into the chasm and end up sore, bruised and limping.

But mostly we discover that what we give away is a reflection of the abundance within us, is proof of our grace and all that we have to give.

So we sit back down again, ready to wrestle the illusion of scarcity to the ground, never giving up or giving in.

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6 Responses to The illusion

  1. Do you know how great it feels to see so many inspirational people (Chris Brogan, Jason from 37signals, and now you, Sasha) writing about slowing down and focusing today?

    I needed to read this, to be reminded of the importance behind slowing down, focusing, and giving away the gift I have to give.

    Thank you.

  2. Sasha says:

    Thank you, Tanner, for reading and for sharing this. I think it is something we all struggle through – too often silently.

  3. Every day I paint and give away another piece, I experience this feeling. Thank you for putting words to it.
    :)

  4. Elaine says:

    Thanks for voicing the strength it takes to be vulnerable, and for reminding me that creating is both our gift and our grace. I always appreciate your thoughtful and poetic posts.

  5. Sasha says:

    Thank you Elaine, and thank you for your great writing that you share with the world at http://philanthropywriting.wordpress.com

  6. Thank you for finding the words for this. A challenge and inspiration.

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